2007, New Year, New Club...

To my Brothers and friends,
I have embarked on
my footballing career once more.
I am now offically,
a Manchester United player.

I have a living like a "Xiao Nan Ren" for almost 2months!
OMG..
This "xiao nan ren" concept materialized in my mind
when Miss.L called me up to go out.
I was like broke u know to go out wif gals liao
& she has to call me out at this "poorest" moment in life.

Juz one of the moments in my pathetic life when
I got $$ = no charbos,
I no $$$ = charbos come find me.

Anyway, I was like
"herm, eeeee, ah, orrrrr...."
over the phone when
she STUNNED me wif a "storm bolt".
"Where ur working now?"
"I come fetch u after work?"

U can call me tink too much or low-confidence,
but cmon, a degree nvm, a car?
Within like 1-2yrs of working?!?!

It was den I decided I realli need to buck up.
Actualli still got another instance from
"always my dearest", Miss.W
Saw her in,
a CAR also!
Driving past BP plaza and stoppin to say "hi".
So I bucked up and
wif my talents n skills,
I have come to find Manchester United
who are willingly to sign me on a free transfer.

It was quite easy to find a club.
But, ss long as u can get to the club for a trial,
CFM can get one lo.
U juz hav to display ur skills
& the manager will be impressed.

I also learn tt clubs r actualli very RICH.
They always offered less unless got competitors.

I went for a selection trial at Chelsea, MAn U and Arsenal.
Arsenal was the first I went to,
and I instantly got an offer from Mr.Wenger,
who was deeply impressing by my passing skills.
Den I went for trials at Man U, and Chelsea.

Arsenal offered me quite a lowly sum at first,
but when they heard wat Man U offered me.
(Sir.Alex was also deeply impressed,
but by my goal-scoring powerness)

Arsenal tried to match the salary.
However, when Mr.Mourinho called
and wanted me to play for them.
I was like, OMG.
As earlier on,
Mr.Mourinho tot he only had
Arsenal to vie wif for my services,
he offered me a small token.
But when I told him about Man U offer,
he immediately
increased his offer.

In e End,
it was a salary war
btwn Man U and Chelsea
as Arsenal simply had no way
to match Man U & Chelsea

It was a simple matter actualli,
To play for the club
tt offers e highest salary.

However,
as a young player,
I needed playing time.
After careful advice
from my agent, Mr.Toh.
I decided to play for Man U.

After all,
Chelsea wanted me to
play as a midfielder
whereas at Man U,
I can get the chance to
link up wif Mr.Rooney.

I realli do hope
my partnership wif
Rooney will goes well
& hopefully
we can bring the trophy
home this season..
_______________________________

Sidenote:
I also have a bet wif Sir.Alex
to score 20goals this season.

Some people say

"Ren yi bu feng ping lang jing,

Tui yi bu hai kuo tian kong"

Sum pple say

"E world is a better place,

if u look at the little things".

I say, Yea Rite~. Cmon la,

the world is fucked up lo.

"You see things from an optimistic viewpoint" la,

"Better things will come" la~

FUCK YOU>>> bleah~'

How can LIFE be good even in these times,

when sum People say

"The economy r startin to pick up & life will be better."

when all I see is,

the rich gettin richer n the poor gettin poorer?

To all the pple who whine, (unless ur realliii a gal)

Face e hard fact.

The Only People without any troubles r all in the cemeteries liao.

Dead you got it?

Fucking Pissed off DEAD.

But, if u realli like to keep on whinninh & rattling on abt urself,

ur petty troubles (which u tink very BIG)

and ur life so cham (say when compared to Bill Gates?)

Got no shit for you..

Sure, you can be "Happpiieeeeeee" too~

Join the dead!

Fuck off, go jump off or anythin.

You CAN be Happpiieeeee if ur DEAD.

-juz dun haunt me comes the night-

My point is ----> Every1 got problems, face it!

Minor or major problems, but u know wat?

I seriously dun really care,

cm0n, keep ur freakin problems to urselves!

I also got problems wat?

You got, I also got ma.

Wat to do?

Den Every1 tok abt their troubles,

"See who most pathetic" competition ah?

Wats the use of complaining to others ?

Okie, maybe if u r my "dear dear" or "brother", den tok to me~

If not, DUN. period.

I look like Saint.Zhong to you?

Problematic fuckers.

Outside ACT happy, inside not HAPPY,

Inside Happy Outside Not Happy,

Why cannot juz take it like a man?

Outside Inside all not HAppy la~

Like tt more Song rite?

Wait wait, Wat if , wat if ,

u dun knw u Happy or not Happy,

den go die lo~*

Not trying to promote any stupid elite shit here,

if ur not happy wif ur life,

either u take it like a man N LIVE wif it

Or u go jump off la,

((den BELIEVE FIRMLY tt come nxt life, you be born a RICH dickie lo.))

There solved, EASY~

Come to tink of it, realli evny those in the cemeteries leh.. So happy, so troublefree~

And Now, I sound like the kind of people I hate~

_______________________________

Haiz..

Life still sucks afterall.

Maybe I should juz get a gal.

Afterall, pple call me the 40yr OLD virgin.

Yea, rite..

.When the moon falls & the river subsides?.

"Remember the times during primary school, remember when lil boys n girls got paired up together in class. Remember when the form teacher tells the boys to hold hands together, to always protect ur lil girl.
I remember when I used to hold my partner hands during the walk to the canteen for recess.
I remember when I would get the fork & spoon for my partner.
I remember to always stand up for my partner when she got bullied."

Funny how these stuff taught to us from our teacher from young still holds true today.
To let us guys know tt girls are little Princesses
& need to be protected and cared for.

--Optional: Enter Li ShenJie's "Chi Xing Jue Dui" for better audio effects--

Lookin for

GF rite now, pls email ur particulars to:

If_U_realli_believe_it@dumbass.com
-----------------------------------------
From a idiotic nerdy guy
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Comments --> Ya right...